So this is going to be a random post about self-advice on how to keep yourself up and positive.
I have been doing through a great time staying positive and not giving a shit about things that try to bring me down. I have lost a couple friendships down the line, but that is not as important as my own happiness and the support of other people who truly support me.
1. Cutting off the bad relationships that affect your negatively.
When people who you consider friends are starting to have a negative affect in your life and no matter what you do, it still continues to bring you down, it is better the break off with that person.
2. Make changes for the better
So recently I have been making a lot of changes in my life, in slow steps. These changes have greatly improved my attitude, well-being, and my life in general
Change A- I turned off facebook-
From my last post before my “Ghost Stories Review”, I had mentioned how I deactivated Facebook. That post only listed just a few reason why people should turn off facebook. I find that I now have more time in my life to do other things. I have my garden up again, so I spend more time with it. I also do more cooking and spend at least 1/3 or more of the time less on the computer that I normally did.
Its nice to get away from all the “constant pressure” of looking at every little post and update that people I know put on facebook, let alone the stupid ticker feed that allows you to “spy” on other people’s activity. No so private anymore, which I don’t really like.
So far, its been close to a month and I have still yet to miss it a lot. I do love to post my pictures of food, my garden and more. So what I might do is that every month or two, I will go back on to spam people’s pages with picture and close it down again. Ha ha ha . That will annoy the crap out of people.
Change B- Better things for the body
I have been recently trying to sleep better, eat better, and throw in a bit of exercise into the mix. Everyday I try to do simple yoga that I memorized from the Wii Fit game (I’m a nerd, I know) and try to do it one to two times a day along with other toning exercise (all together about 15-20 minutes a day)
I also try to drink more water, and eat cleaner. I still love to eat junk food (dark chocolate or anything dark is my kryptonite ), but I eat less of it and I compensate for my meals. For example. I try to follow a Chinese belief of eating, 早餐吃得好/午餐吃得饱/晚餐吃得少 (Eat a good breakfast, eat a full lunch, eat a small dinner). Of course, the daily schedule changes and I really can’t keep to this, but I try to eat more fruits and vegetables, less meat (or less fatty meats), and more healtier foods. Even when baking, I make healthier recipes. In healthier, I mean, knowing that I can reduce the sugar and oil of the foods. I love to make cookies, cakes and more. I don’t want to reduce the yummy and delicious flavor of the recipes, but I do make slight changes to make the recipe slightly healthier. I also bring more than half of my bakings to my work place, so that co-workers will do my eating for me!
Change C- making myself feel good
Recently, I have started to make subtle changes to my wardrobe that I see myself looking better in the mirror. I loved to wear comfortable clothes, such as jeans and just regular t-shirts to work. However, I am not getting any younger and looking the same everyday just isn’t doing it for me any more. For example, this was my work outfit for today
I got a couple compliments from work today and it made me feel good. It goes against all of principles of accepting compliments because I am just not really used to it and I always humble myself in front of people. I am also going out with some friends tomorrow and will wear a summer dress. I never wear dresses because of the too much air feeling down there because I wear jeans so much, however I have started to wear leggings more so I’m getting used to it.
I also go out more with the better friends that I have and it makes me feel better.
Change D- getting a second job that I like
Next to my first job that I work part time, I also got another job as a part time data entry . I really like it because I am the only worker next to my boss who is trying to start her own office for her own business and I use the computer to input data (which I love to do). More over, I can pick how many hours I want around my first job, my boss is the most flexible person I have ever met.
Now of course this means I will be busier for the next coming months/ year, but hey, it means more money that I make and can save for bigger things. I love both my jobs and I will stick with them for a while.
3. Do whatever the hell you want
There are many things that I’ve always wanted to do, but there were things holding me back. Now that I want to make myself feel good, I am doing whatever I want (well, when I have the time). My first live concert with Coldplay was the first of many “whatever the hell I want” things I that I will do. I guess you can call it a kind of bucket list, which can also be one. There are a lot of things I want to do next, one of them is to get a dog. So right now, I’m trying to save up money for one because having a pet ain’t cheap!
For all other things, I will try to do them when I have the time, and if they need money (when I have money). I hope that I can do many of them so I can feel accomplished and have them under my belt!
Overall, I am feeling great, but it doesn’t mean I don’t have my down moments. However the pluses out weight the negative.
One thing I want to just write out. I have a friend of mine who was very upset with her boyfriend because he is preventing her from speaking to a guy friend of her who used to like her and was friends with the guy as well. He has backed off now that she is in a relationship, but her boyfriend has refused her to speak with him. Talk about possessive… She loves her boyfriend, but she misses her friend and is now starting to get upset.
By the way, this can go either way in relationships such as thing, not in just heterosexual, but in same sex relationship as well. Lots of people in relationships are possessive and that can be a scary thing.
I told her that, “you should not feel that you have to stop being friends with the guy just because your boyfriend said so. You have the right to talk with him. You also should not be influenced by your boyfriend if he says shit about the guy. If you know that your friend is good, continue your friend with him, because sometimes you shouldn’t always believe something that someone says about another person. Don’t be leashed by your boyfriend. If your boyfriend is all up on your ass about this, then you might want to rethink about your relationship with the man. He doesn’t seem to respect your wishes.”
I don’t know what the outcome will be, but I hope that she will make the right choice